Hair Esteem

September 1, 2016


Technology isn't the only thing that changes quickly now a days.  From a little girl to a woman I have seen hairstyles go from afros, press outs, jheri curls, wave nouveaus, braids, dreads, relaxers, colors, short hair in the top long in the back (Y'all know what I am talking about lol), finger waves, freezes, scrunches, extensions, keratin treatments, brazilian blowouts, wigs, etc.  The hair industry is fun to watch because there is so much creativity!  


Since I was a girl sitting in the salon, I knew the power a great hairstyle had on a woman.  That is one of the main reasons I became a hairstylist.  Here recently I went through a hairstyle change.  I did something that I said I would never do.. I WENT NATURAL!  After having long relaxed hair for all of my life, I took the plunge. Honestly, I never considered going natural because I attached a part of my self esteem and identity to my hair unknowingly.  I LOVED my long hair, it was silky, healthy, and most of the time it is what I got complimented on the most.  Most guys I dated would say,"Don't ever cut your hair." Poor them lol  So unconsciously, I listened and accepted this identity of "Tashell with the long hair".  I don't like change and with everything else changing around me, my hair was safe and consistent.  I didn't think I would be beautiful any other way sadly.  


I remember the day like it was yesterday, even though it was many months ago.  I had decided to go natural months before, but the plan was to NEVER, NEVER, wear my hair curly.  I needed some length to swing right?! lol  So I had been flat ironing my hair during my transition...My arms were killing me because my hair is T-H-I-C-K!  I walked in front of a mirror after a shampoo and shocked I had this beautiful texture of hair mixed with curls, coils, and waves. My daughter Taylor said,"Mom you should just cut off the straight hair." Then it became like a dare or something.  I was dreading the blowout silk press process, so it sounded like a great idea, but I hesitated....I couldn't tell my daughter that I didn't think I would be pretty if I let go of my long hair. I teach her that beauty is within, and your self esteem comes from what God thinks that you are..(fearfully and wonderfully made).


My heart was beating so fast, I couldn't believe this simple act made me feel this much anxiety.  I grabbed the shears, and I began to cut.  (After she called me scary a number of I ain't no punk) When I was done, I was staring at myself in disbelief.  I looked like a troll!  I wanted to cry, but the stylist in me kicked in to find a solution that would make me feel beautiful again.  The mother in me kicked in and acted like I was ok, when I wanted to fall apart.  When my husband got home, he was more excited about my new look than I expected.  Most men don't like for you to cut your  


After digging and finding some product out of my stash to style my hair, I slowly began to fall in love with this new hair journey.  It took me a while to get used to turning my head and my hair not following, LAWD it took a while!  I quickly found products that worked well with my hair texture( because I am a stylist of course..:), Unexpectedly this change has uncovered a natural beauty that I never knew I had.  I love the hair that God hand picked just for me!  I feel free to be totally and naturally ME!  Even though I get more compliments now on my hair than I ever have, I am learning that it's my belief in myself and knowing my worth that really turns heads.  To have a healthy head of good looking hair will always be apart of me, but my esteem no longer lies there.   I am uncompromised beauty!  So tell me, do you have hair esteem or self esteem?

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